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Really!? (I could get rich off this story)

mass konfuzion — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 16:58:50 +0000

Let me tell you a crazy story. I couldn’t make this up, even with my ridiculous imagination. I’m not even the main character of this story, but it’s so outlandish that I have to tell it.

On Monday, I left town for a business trip with one colleague from Chicago, and another colleague from New York. The trip was a 5-day affair, taking 3 days in Indianapolis, IN and 2 days in Shelbyville, KY. On Monday, we all traveled separately–Ms. New York and I took flights down from our respective cities, while Mr. Chicago drove his own car from Chicago to Indianapolis, because he needed to return to Chicago on Tuesday for a meeting, after which he planned to fly back down to Indy and join us. From there, we would carpool to Shelbyville, do our duties and then fly back home.

That was the plan. That’s not what happened…

What did happen deserves an Academy Award for best story. First, after spending all of Monday in Indianapolis, we discovered that Mr. Chicago had developed a slow leak at some point during the day, because he had a flat tire on his car that night. Naturally, we found this out after every tire repair shop and car rental location had closed, forcing Mr. Chicago to go to the airport, roughly 30 minutes away, to get a rental car to drive back to Chicago.

The next day, his scheduled morning meeting got pushed back to the afternoon, which prevented him from returning on the flight he planned. He ended up having to drive back to Indy in the car he rented. As if that weren’t enough, while he was in Chicago, a freak thunderstorm pelted Indianapolis with quarter-sized hail and probably put some dings in his car, which was parked in the uncovered lot outside the building. (As an aside, that same storm downed trees, destroyed windshields, and even knocked over a gazebo several miles west of where we were).

After that ordeal, he finally made it back to Indianapolis. A couple of hours later, when we decided to grab some food, Mr. Chicago noticed that his wallet was missing, much to his exasperated chagrin. That made his hotel check-in interesting, since he had no ID or credit card.

Mind you, it’s still only Tuesday in this story…

Wednesday almost restored our faith in the balance of the universe. We were able to get the flat tire repaired, return the rental car early for a reduced price, and we even had good meetings that day. Aside from Mr. Chicago not being able to drink a mojito with us at dinner, the day was the highlight of the week for him. Also, it was Ms. New York’s birthday, so she and I had a celebratory shot of something painfully minty and called it a night.

Then, Thursday happened. That morning, we had to drive out to Shelbyville, but not before our requisite intravenous caffeine injection coffee run. Somehow, Mr. Chicago misplaced his cell phone! He said he thought it happened at the coffee shop, but he didn’t find it when he went back to look for it. Add that to the fact that he still had no wallet, and therefore, no money to buy gas to drive from Indianapolis to Shelbyville (and certainly not from Shelbyville back to Chicago), that cell phone incident basically ended the week for him.

It’s unbelievable..

Obama ’09/MassKonFuzion Does Video

mass konfuzion — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 00:58:28 +0000

Lately, I’ve been adding to my multimedia skillset by fooling around with video editing, and my latest creation is up on YouTube. The video is a mashup of clips I shot while in Washington, D.C. for the inauguration of Barack Obama. The temperature was frigid, and I slept less than 3 hours the night before the ceremony.

And it was worth every second.

I shot the video clips with a regular ol’ Panasonic DMC-TZ3. It’s not fancy by any means. In fact, it’s kind of bad for shooting video.

Gotta start somewhere, right?

So check out the video, and leave some comments.

I Sit Down Too Much…

mass konfuzion — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 05:50:59 +0000

Since I’m a self-proclaimed computer nerd (and a professional desk jockey), you may have trouble taking me seriously in this post. That is, you may think I’m the food cooking in the pot I’m calling black. But I have to gripe–I sit down too much. During the day, I might look like I’m awake and alert, but I really want to do this:

The problem is, I’m good at corporate workboy-ism, and not so good at other stuff, like professional athletics. Thus, I have one of those typical office jobs (read: an-8-hour-a-day-sit-behind-a-desk-focused-intently-on-an-LCD-screen-while-not-moving-except-to-use-the-bathroom-job). Here’s a recount of a typical day in the life of Lou:

If it’s a travel day, I spend a few hours sitting at the airport or in a plane. Don’t forget the time I sit in a cab getting transported from point to point. Otherwise, if I’m in Chicago, I sit on the train for about an hour. I also sit in my car on the way to/from the train station.
I’ll spend a few hours sitting at my desk, usually typing something. Nevermind the fact that I might go blind.
Maybe I’ll go to a few meetings. If I’m lucky, they won’t bore me to sleep, but I digress. At those meetings, guess what I do. I’ll give you a hint: If you didn’t say “sit down,” you’re an idiot.
After those meetings, I’ll have some new collection of notes, instructions and insights on what I’ll pass the next few hours working on, seated of course, at the computer.

I skipped meals. If you eat standing up, you’re abnormal. I also neglected to mention sleeping (although, with as much train and plane riding as I do, I’ve gotten pretty good at sleeping sitting down, too). But you get the point.

Don’t get me wrong; I hit the gym (at least 3 times a week, especially in recent months), play soccer and basketball fairly frequently, ride my bike as often as I can, rollerblade, skip the ol’ speed rope from time to time, and jog sometimes. Despite all that, I still spend a greatly disproportionate amount of time doing my best impression of a tree stump.

Even the activities I enjoy the most really aren’t that active at all. Take, for example, my most time-consuming hobby: music. The time it consumes almost invariably comprises my sitting at my computer or desk, writing songs. Wathcing movies? Sitting. Hanging out with friends? Sitting. Even writing this post, I’m sitting. Am I doomed to spend the majority of the my waking hours warming the surface of a chair, bench, or stool? This doesn’t seem right; I don’t think natural selection has been working all this time to eliminate those who couldn’t sit the longest (survival of the fattest??). I’ve never seen a gold medal handed out for Olympic Couch Posing. And I doubt I ever will..

If only I could get paid my same salary to test exercise equipment or something. Is that too much to ask? I open the floor to you: WWYD (what would you do)?